Now. This is another thing that I haven't yet regretted but I get the feeling that I will in the near future. Yes I know it's a cliche but this one is like a whole new level of stupid cliche. There is this girl. I didn't even plan on liking her. I was just gonna use her as a teaching aid and stuff. There was this one time I even said that I treat her like a big sister coz she was very mature and collected and stuff. I guess things just get out of hand when she starts to message me and all that. I started to get all fidgety and I even got angry at her. I mean like, "I'm mad at u more than them coz I like U" kinda angry. I even felt that 'guilt' feeling, that sharp pain when she noticed I was mad at her. I even fessed and told her everything a while later as I really didn't want her to worry about it(eventhough she didn't even care in the first place). Its just that... its my fault for feeling more than I should but... really... she was just so nice. I could even compare her nagginess with my mother.
"If she can act like a second mother to you, then she's good enough" - XIII PrinciplesShe fits the bill just nice. That is also the biggest problem. She's too good for me. Makes me feel... unworthy and stuff. Ya know. That kind of feeling. Yeah. I even asked Rowern to help me with this girl. I NEVER ask for other guys to solve my girl problems. I solve them myself. But this one... I wanted to try every single method just to at least make her say, "Your new shirt is nice ^_^. So tidy" That would make me smile for weeks. But she never even say that. She is very careful. Very general. I know. The way she speaks and addresses people... is general. Like how she addresses me. I am gonna regret letting her go. Before even trying. Because I know. It is just not gonna work out. :') Sorry for liking you, Ila-chan.
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